Know your strengths
September 29, 2008 | Ministry Life
“I just don’t understand why I can’t do this better,” she said.
The 40-something woman put her head in her hands. “I should be able to do this.”
Or maybe not.
She was trying to teach high schoolers. They were intimidating to her. Some walked all over her, ignoring her rules, defying her authority. She didn’t connect with them. Felt they were unfriendly, closed-off.
She talked to me because I love teens. I love working with them. I love listening to them. And I know that once you earn the right, you can help shape them or give advice, or maybe just listen as they find their own way.
Funny, but I was in a weird zone of my own that night. I was asked to speak at an event for young girls. Pre-teens, they said. It was a little out of my comfort zone, but not so much that I worried about it.
Until I arrived at the event. When they said pre-teen, they meant 5 to 9 years old. Tops.
I’m not a children’s pastor. I think kids are cute. Really cute. And I’m good one-on-one with a child, but not a district-wide retreat with a gym full of them. I stood in that gym and realized I was crazy out of my comfort zone.
Suddenly, I started revising my message in my head. Nix the powerpoint. Nix the cultural messages that affect pre-teens. Nix the time limit I had created. Before I left I had stuffed some props in the car just in case I needed them. I was a little unsure of the technology that would be there, so I had stuffed all kinds of fun shoes (to run the race, wear the right shoes – don’t try to be someone you’re not); a bag of fun hats (we all want to be different things in life, but it is the “crown” we are running after); a Jesus costume (we don’t change the external to be like Jesus; it’s internal).
Those props saved my life!
I had fun with the girls and afterwards, when we prayed I wrapped my arms around these sweet little girls and we prayed for dogs that had injuries, for papa with a broken arm, and lots more.
But as I drove home, I realized once again “this is not my strength”. I can do it, but it’s not me. It’s not where God called me. And yet others are a perfect fit.
“Know your strengths,” I said to my new friend. “If you feel totally overwhelmed working with teens, but comfortable and happy working with children, why are you trying to force this?”
The answer? She thought she needed to at least try it so that she could “learn to love” this age group.
She was a mom of three young children. She’s great with them. She’s one of those creative women who love to paint, play, and connect with little ones. They are drawn to her. A small child sat in her lap the whole night. The little girl didn’t even know her, but she felt safe with her.
Know your strengths, and perfect those. Run after them. It doesn’t mean that you ever stop learning or that you don’t go out of your comfort zone, but it does mean you stop trying to pound a diamond-shaped personality into a square hole.
What are your strengths? Do you know them? Or are you trying to be something you were never intended to be?
If you are in the Grapevine TX area, I’ll be speaking at MOPS Intl. this weekend at the Gaylord Convention Center. Blessings!
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Great message, Suzie. It’s reassuring to know that it’s okay when we don’t feel like a natural at certain things.
September 29th, 2008 at 8:05 pm