Longing for Communion
January 1, 2009 | Knowing Christ
Last night I attended a Watch Service at my church. For some reason I’ve looked forward to it all week. Pastor shared a short sermon on anticipating change in the New Year, but I can’t tell you the specifics. Candles were lit. The lights were dim. The church was more full than I anticipated.
We had communion. All beautiful, but still not what I longed for, not knowing how to put words behind it.
And then it was over. Pastor asked any of us who desired to come to the altar and pray. As I knelt, there it was. What I was missing. What I had longed for all week.
Him.
Something inside of me longed to begin the New Year in His presence. Quiet. Gentle. Soft.
Powerful. Filling. Overflowing.
Sufficient.
I get so busy sometimes that that part of who I am gets put aside. I pray. I read the Bible. I minister. I am mom. I am Suzie. I blog. I write. I speak. I clean. I pay bills. I write some more…
But at the core of me, I am His. And that part of me was teetering on empty.
I was longing for communion. More than a cracker and a thimble of juice. I needed to sense His presence and rest in the reality of a Heavenly Father.
Thank you, Lord, that I can reach for you and find you.
Happy New Year to all of you. I appreciate you — more than you know.
Suz
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Beautiful!
January 1st, 2009 at 6:23 pmI was thinking and feeling exactly the same way as you were, but didnt know how to express it and to whom. I thank God for letting me know there is someone in the same plight as I was who is eager to spend time with Him and be filled with His sweet love and gentleness.This makes me to appreciate Him better. God bless you and your ministry.
January 2nd, 2009 at 7:41 amThank you for expressing many of the emotions I have wrestled with during this holiday season. My moment of unmet expectations came during our church’s Christmas Eve Eve Service on December 23rd. After a year of planning and antipation, I expected God to meet me in a fresh way at the service. Although no fault of anyone, I left feeling empty and discouraged. Rather than eagerly welcoming the birth of our Savior I felt alone and disconnected. 2008 had left me wounded and weary. I needed a sign. I needed a fresh start. As I begin a new year with a new devotional, “Solo” by Eugene Peterson, I was reminded on Day 1 that by the third chapter of Genesis, humanity had already disobeyed God and that the remainder of the Bible is a His Soveriegn Plan to redeem, restore, and reconcile us back into Him. My heart’s desire is to feel His presence daily and know I am pleaseing Him in all that I do. Thank you for the encouragement as we begin a new year walking in faith.
January 2nd, 2009 at 1:16 pmSuz, this was a beautiful post. although the holidays are over and I’m anxious to get back to our normal routine, I long for God’s fresh touch in my life each day!
January 2nd, 2009 at 7:32 pmI appreciate your thoughts this day … I just commented to
January 3rd, 2009 at 8:33 pmmy husband while having lunch today that I was happy the
holidays were over again. He wondered why, no, he didn’t say
that but I noticed the ‘look! I suppose teetering on emply
is exactly what I’m feeling. I am so grateful
that I too can find Him and His peace once again. Thanks so
much for your insightful words.