reconnected
January 6, 2010 | Faith: Knowing Christ, Family: Nurturing Family
Somewhere in the past year I got disconnected from my church. I still went on Sundays, when I was in town. I still claimed them as my church (and thankfully, they claimed me as well), but I had lost something really valuable.
Community.
Some say you can have God without church. I believe that. God is vast and sovereign, but I also believe that being with others who love Him draw us closer to Him.
I made a Christmas resolution. New Year’s was too far away. I was going to intentionally move toward community again.
I’ve been dropping in on the teens on Sunday mornings–mainly just because I love them–but this Sunday I chose an adult discipleship group. When I walked in the teachers, Dennis and Sherri, announced to the group that I was going to be a grandma. Then they got to the business of Scripture.
Oh, friends, I needed that. I didn’t even know how much I needed it. Instead of giving out, I was taking in, and it was good. I was hearing Scripture from another person’s perspective, listening as we weighed it, discussed how to apply it.
Later that night we went to Sunday evening service. Now that we live in another city, traveling to church twice in one day means 3 hours and 180-miles round trip so we don’t do it as often. But that doesn’t mean we can’t do it.
So we did.
It was a prayer service and most of the evening was spent praying together.
Again, I needed it and didn’t even realize how much. Praying with two friends, watching God at work, sensing His overwhelming presence and power and grace…
Maybe we don’t need “church” to find God, but it was reminder to me that living my faith alone sometimes makes me feel disconnected, distant–not so much from my amazing Savior, but from the practice of living faith and discussing faith with others who have experienced that salvation.
My heart will always be outside of the pew — with people who are asking or seeking answers, but inside the pew is a place of refreshment and strength as I run after the heart of God in ministry.
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“My heart will always be outside of the pew…”
I love this concept of church beyond the walls/or ministry beyond the walls of a church. You state it beautifully! This gives me something to chew on today. Thank you!
January 6th, 2010 at 1:09 pmFor the past month I have been out of church for various reasons and I know exactly what you mean. I need that fellowship with others. Last night I went to Bible study an it felt good. When the person I sit next to in church asked if I needed a check filled out it made me realize that I do have friends in church. Maybe not close friends. Another said she’d have to call me sowe we can get together. No one has said that to me in a few years. It just felt good to be there and be fed the word.
January 6th, 2010 at 3:28 pmWhat an awesome post Suzie! Well spoken too! I think we all go through that feeling of disconnection at one point or another but when we reconnect sparks sure fly!
January 6th, 2010 at 6:25 pmSuzanne,
. My church family has been the best thing for me.
I completely understand how you feel. Two and a half years ago, I was a new college grad. and I was moving out on my own for the very first time ever. I mean completely on my own. My parents weren’t going to have to buy me food or pay for my gas or anything. I was going to have a new job, fresh out of college, and I was excited. Well, That all happened and again, I was excited!!! I moved to north Arkansas with my mom and lived with her until I found that first job. But, I was in a hurry to move out and I did. I got my first apartment and living on my own was wonderful, this 24 year old didn’t have to answer to anyone. I could make midnight runs to Walmart just because I was bored and didn’t have to tell anyone where I was going.
However, after about 4 months, I was getting depressed. I don’t know if it was the job (I was a case manager at a Youth Home), the alone part of living alone, or if it was because I didn’t have alot of friends. Anyway, I wasn’t going to church (I don’t like church “shopping”). When I did go to church, I would always find a reason why I didn’t want to go back to that church. The pastor’s sermon was too long, the people where too nosy, the church was cold, etc. After almost a year (11 months and 2 weeks) at my job, I was fired. The depression had taken over my life and was affecting every aspect of it. I didn’t talk to my mom and dad. My family and friends relationships suffered. And my work life did too. I messed up bad at work and the board fired me. I was devastated and embarrassed, I was more upset because I was going to have to move back home with one of my parents. Which is not what I wanted to do. So after a month of planning what I would do and where I would go, I decided to move in with my dad in South Arkansas. Now I say all this to get to the point of my church family. When I moved back home with my dad, i started going to church at my home church. I had been away so long that I didn’t think anyone would want me back. I thought they wouldn’t care to see me. I thought they would ask me “How long you stayin’ this time?” Seriously, this is what I expected. But NO! When I walked back in that door after 4 years, at least, I got hugs and warm welcomes, and my church family was genuinely nice and concerned about my life and what I had been doing. I felt welcomed back, I felt at home. Since that first time back, I have gotten involved a little bit at a time. First, choir, a fundraiser, then awanas. I decided to get into awanas because I wasn’t working and I needed something to do with my nights. I liked children so I took a chance on helping with the kiddos and their readings every Wednesday. Before I knew it, if I missed a night, the girls in my class would ask me where I had been and if I was sick missing church
in the almost 2 years I’ve been back, the depression is gone. I am getting closer to God. I had forgotten what it was like to be around God’s people. I’m so thankful for being fired from my job. Not only have I found another job, but I have started Grad school to work on my Master’s. God really does use our trials to help us grow.
I’m sorry for being so long winded, but I actually cut the story in half. There is so much more I could have told you about how God is working my life these last few years. Maybe one day, I will be able to tell you. Thanks for your inspiration. Jennifer
January 6th, 2010 at 11:10 pmSusie,
I have been receiving these encouragements for a few months. They come to my business email address. I do not get a chance to read each one of them, but I do what I can to do so. Today, I needed your encouragement message. I prayed this morning that God would give me the time to read today encouragement, and though your’s was yesterday, HE gave me time to read yours as well. Thank you for the time you spend encouraging others who may be in need of helpful words from God.
I have been caring for my mother for years, but these last 16 months have been unbarable to me. The doctors found cancer 16 months ago and we have been trying to get her to survive ever since. My days are long. My spirit is low, and my hope fluctuates. My life has been turned upside down. I wish these were our only problems, but of course they are not. Still, I needed someone to guide me to a thought stronger than my problems. A thought deeper than the grave. So I thank you.
I gotta go. Sorry.
January 13th, 2010 at 2:21 pm