thank you
January 22, 2010 | Family: Nurturing Family
I traveled to Fayetteville a couple of days ago to spend some time with Melissa, and to talk with a genetic counselor. As my daughters approach the age I was when I was diagnosed with cancer 18 years ago, I’ve thought a lot about genetic testing.
We met with a counselor and made a very personal decision on what to do (another post for another day).
But it was during that session that I had my aha moment.
Melissa listed her fam — me, her dad, brother and sister, grandparents. There was one little twist there with my biological father, but otherwise it was a straight shot.
Then it was my turn. How many brothers and sisters do you have?
Easy answer, right. Two sisters. Two brothers. One older sister deceased.
No, that’s not right.
As we brainstormed, the correct answer looked like this: Two full sisters. One half maternal sister (even typing this hurts my heart, for she is my full sis in every way). Two half maternal brothers (ditto on the last comment). One half paternal brother and his sister, my paternal half sister (who I’m just now reconnecting with, and am grateful). Two more half paternal sisters that I’ve never met, who are somewhere around the age of my own daughters.
My family tree was confusing, not just to the genetic counselor, but to me.
At one point she asked, “How many sisters does your dad have?”
Easy.
Four.
No, I take that back. “When you said father, my dad came into my mind. The one who raised me. My biological father has two, I think.”
My aha moment wasn’t that my family tree was so complex, but that the family tree I define myself by is such a blessing to me:
My beautiful husband and his strong, no-bounds, we-are-in-each-others-lives family. My mom. My dad. My sisters, brothers, nieces, nephews.
My girls. Strong, fierce, intertwined in my heart. My son, my friend. My two sons-in-law that I consider my own. My blond, beautiful daughter-in-law that is affectionate and a joy.
And little Elle or Dylan (or Wyatt) who will arrive in July, my first grandchild.
I remember holding Leslie as a new mom and desperately asking God to help me give her something safe and stable–and fun and nurturing. That was 28 years ago.
What I didn’t realize at that moment is that He would give me the same thing. As I learned to love, I received it back a hundred times over.
My Heavenly Father somehow took a broken family tree and made it strong for that hope-filled young mom.
So for today, I just want to stop everything and say thank you to Him, for I am beyond grateful for what He can do, and did for me.
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Praying for you and your beautiful daughters as you wait on the genetic testing results. I am so glad you are here, with us, and your amazing family. We love you Suzie!!!
January 22nd, 2010 at 1:09 pmThis is awesome!
January 22nd, 2010 at 4:01 pm