rage is never the answer
February 18, 2010 | Family: Nurturing Family
I’ve been traveling today. Cell phone securely turned off. In a Southwest airplane cocoon. When I saw the Tweet go out that a plane had crashed into an IRS building in Austin, TX, I thought somebody was playing a bad joke. Unfortunately, someone died today because he thought crashing a plane into the side of a building was an answer to his rage.
When we react in rage, it’s like dominoes. Relationships and people go tumbling down.
Like the guy I saw on the road the other day. Running his truck up to the bumper of a car, flashing the universal sign out his car window. Intimidating.
Let’s fight. I’m so mad I’ve lost control and I don’t care what I look like, or how this makes you feel.
Somewhere these individuals lost sight that their actions really do matter. There might be a child in a car seat just out of view. There might be an innocent man trying to earn a living for his family in that office building. A grandpa. A father. A husband. A son.
Very few of us are going to crash into a building, and while we might gripe about the guy/gal who is driving side-by-side the semi at 40 mph, we keep it to a mutter.
But rage isn’t limited to the headlines. It’s boiling under the surface for a lot of us. It’s waiting to erupt because it just keeps getting pushed it down. After all, we don’t want to be “that girl” or “that guy” who loses it.
Or maybe you are already losing it. Cool as a cucumber around John Q Public and a screaming, you-can’t-trust-me-because-I-can’t-trust-myself person at home.
Rage is unresolved anger, so let’s look at it honestly.
Admit it. Show it to God. Let Him see it in all it’s ugliness.
Look at the bigger picture. Who is affected when you lose it? How many apologies have you offered, only to do it again?
Crucify it (put it to death). What? Suzie, I need more than that.
So do I. That’s why daily I take those parts of me that I don’t like, that hurt others, and I offer them up to God. It has to be more than words.
Daily I look into the faces of the people I love the best, and if I want to be real with anyone, it’s these individuals. I want them to have the best parts of me.
Daily I look at my own life, not in a legalistic, fatalistic point of view, but with the hope and belief that with God everything is possible. I have to be honest about my shortcomings, and also honest about my strengths.
Work on one (with God’s help and guidance and grace). Crucify the other.
For me, temper was once an issue. Sometimes, it tries to rear its ugly head and come back into the picture.
But I’ve learned that over time, as you and I build and nurture the good parts of us, the bully (emotions, feelings) that wants to jerk you and I around by the neck gets smaller.
The bully is surprised when its used to forcing us into a knee-jerk reactions and we don’t. The Spirit part of you and I that loves Jesus jumps up and down in joy.
I’m praying for the innocent people in Austin hurt today by one man’s rage.
And I’m also praying for those who feel like rage has had too big a part of their life, and want a brand new start.
What an awesome place to begin… with prayer.
Father, Thank you that I can be real with You.
Thank you for emotions, for the ability to feel, but God if those emotions have trapped me, I want a fresh start. I place that burden at the Cross today. And if tempted to pick it up tomorrow, or in the next 15 minutes, I’ll come right back to you and place it there again. Let me see rage for what it is, and the damage that it does. I ask for peace and strength that can only come from You.
In the powerful name of Jesus. Amen
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This was a shocker — it’s about fifteen minutes from the church where I work. Thankfully, so far, I haven’t heard of any deaths. Only two were injured. God was protecting people in that building, for certain.
February 18th, 2010 at 5:33 pmI am one of those raging folks. I do so well to control it only to lose my temper at home with the ones I love the most. Last week was an especially bad week but then I was able to getaway for the weekend. I spend some time showing it to God and then giving it to Him. Thanks for sharing your story.
February 18th, 2010 at 10:27 pmSuzie, that’s powerful. I am in agreement with you. We need to stop and take stock of ourselves. We need to take ALL of our burdens to the LORD and leave them at His feet. He’ll handle them. That’s how awesome He is! Thank You Father God.
February 19th, 2010 at 2:31 amPowerful post, dear sister. I won’t soon forget the image of the bully jerking our emotions around.
February 19th, 2010 at 3:37 pmWOW – I needed this today. I was searching all over the P31 blogs today just looking for something to ‘lift’ this mood i’ve been in. A rage deep inside me that keeps rearing it’s ugly head and exploding at the ones i truly love. They don’t deserve it, i know this yet i continue to do this. I blame it all on the PMS symptoms but really for how long can i continue to do that? I’ve seeked help time and time again only to feel worse. I am definitely beginning with PRAYER today and i hope i can make the commitment to continue with prayer each and every time that little ‘rage’ threatens to explode. Thank you for your words or wisdom and guidance….
February 22nd, 2010 at 11:37 am